writer rant/ Do No Harm

This is from www.badcb.blogspot.ca:

Feb. 9 Writer rant: The EPL Writer in Residence Omar Mouallem said my Rain script was kind of predictable and the dialogue needed work.  I'm not mad about that, because lots of writers and producers have read it, and they all said that.

I guess I'm kind of mad, because Omar said I should start over.  Okay, I can take criticism, no problem.  I guess I have to write about it, to get over it.  Let's get to the bottom of this.  He said "start over" and I don't feel like I should have to start over.  I have done so many changes and rewrites at the beginning of the script.  In a period of 4 yrs, I would say this is the best 43 pages.

He should take a look at all the changes I made.  I mentioned it before in my other emails/ blog posts of: how the bad guys were supposed to be introduced the next day.  Then I decided to make it sooner, like that night.  This was in 2010.

In 2011, the EPL Writer in Residence Marty Chan read it, and said that first morning scene seemed arbitrary.  So I rewrote it, to straight to the night scene.

Feb. 13 Do No Harm: This show is like the modern version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  It's about a doctor by day Dr. Jason Cole, and by night he becomes Ian Price.  I saw the first two episodes and I thought it was really good.  Today I read in the Globe and Mail's article by John Doyle that the show got cancelled. 

Here's some more info about it:

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/nbc-cancels-do-no-harm-417513

Me: What?  It got cancelled?  What about Elementary?  That show is the modern version of Sherlock Holmes and it came out in the fall.  It's doing well.  I only saw the pilot of that show, but I thought it was good.

I read the rest of the linked article, and it's not about old characters from novels being brought into modern times, it's about "dual- universe dramas":

"Do No Harm continues the broadcast networks' struggles with dual-universe dramas. Despite positive reviews, NBC canceled underperformer Awake after one season, and Fox axed Lone Star after two episodes. In 2008, NBC canceled Christian Slater's split-personality series My Own Worst Enemy after a handful of airings."

Writing article: I was checking up on The Golden Vanguard.  Their website was being remade and now I'm on the staff page.

I read the article "5 Ways You're Limiting Your Writing" by Jessica McHugh.

1. Ignoring your issues.
2. Writing is an ART, not a business.
3. Going against your gut.
4. Ignoring feedback.
5. Copying your favorite story.

http://thegoldenvanguard.ca/2013/02/10/5-ways-youre-limiting-your-writing/comment-page-1/#comment-103

I then left a comment at the end of the article:

"Hi, I really like your article.  Good advice and I already have taken some of it before like the line 'Trust your gut, and don’t be afraid to cut. But don’t throw those chunks away. Save them–for years, if need be. Just because you drop fat from one story doesn’t mean it won’t be the meat of another.'  (#3 tip). 

That happens a lot to me.  I write a scene and then think: "I like it, but it doesn't fit in this story" and I save it for another story.

I'm going to mention your article on my blog."

quote/ Love's Everlasting Courage

This is from www.badcb.blogspot.ca: 

Feb. 3 Quote: I found this quote while reading the Globe and Mail life section.  There was an essay by James Drummond and he mentions it.

“Read beyond what you want to write.  So if you want to write romance…read science fiction, read classics.  If you aspire to be a literary writer… to be the next John Updike, read Harlequins.” –Yann Martel, Life of Pi author

Romantic comedies: I was at City Centre mall, and I was sitting in the food court reading the newspaper.  I was biding my time before I had to work at Call Centre #6.  I looked up and see the last 20 min. of the movie Chasing Liberty.  It stars Mandy Moore as the daughter of the President, and it's hard for her to date people because of who she is.

 

I did like the ending.  Most romantic comedies are the same.  I remember watching this Saturday Night Live sketch with Meghan Fox talking to a mom.

 

Mom: I like those movies where a guy and girl fall in love.  Then the guy does something bad, but not so bad that he can't redeem himself afterwards.

Fox: Yeah, that's called a romantic comedy.

 

I did like the ending to Chasing Liberty because it reminded me of the other romantic comedy called The Prince and Me.  If you guys don't want to be spoiled by both movies, skip to the next paragraph.

 

In both movies, the couples toward the end have to end things.  A few months have then passed, and they spend time apart.  They then get back together.  I like the reunited feeling.

 

The Duff: I was reading Seventeen magazine while I was at City Centre.  I read an article about the author Kody Keplinger.  She wrote the book The Duff: Designated Ugly Fat Friend.  She got published at 19 yrs old.  Now she's 21 yrs old and she's making a living off writing.  

 

She got the inspiration when she heard of that name.  Then the story came to her.

 

Conflict: I was reading some old notes from the Writer in Residence at the Edmonton Public Library, Marty Chan.  It was in 2011 when he read The Vertex Fighter.  He then read Parts 3 and 4 (30-50 pages) and his notes mentioned that my script tended to shy away from conflict.

 

A character says something in this scene, but they don't go and extend it to a bigger conflict.  I thought I did, but I was looking at the big picture.  I set up a conflict in one scene at the beginning of the script where the lead character hides something from a character close to him.  In the middle of the movie, the character finds out and there's a big blow out.  

 

There's another character that hides something from the bad guys, and when the bad guys find out, there's a huge conflict at the end of the movie.

 

Love's Everlasting Courage: In Oct. 2012, I saw the TV movie Love Begins.  I only watched it because Wes Brown was in it.  I didn't really like it because it was boring without much conflict.  Here's the review:

 

http://badcb.blogspot.ca/2012/10/love-begins-bullying-sexual-harassment.html

One week later, I went on Youtube, and saw the sequel.  The only reason again was Wes Brown.  This time, the TV movie improved a bit because there was more conflict and things happening in it.  This story is set in the 18th century.  I guess I will use the quote from above as a way to use this TV movie so I could learn about writing.

 

Clark (Wes Brown) rides a carriage with two horses.  It stops because the wheel is broke.  A snake appears and scares the horses, so they run.  Clark chases after it, and stops the horses.  They go back home. 

 

Clark and Ellen are now married with a 6 yr old daughter named Missy.  The Banker comes and says: "You have to pay back loans to the bank.  You missed more than one payment, we'll seize your land."  Good, some conflict is set up.

 

Ellen becomes a seamstress even though Clark disagrees because men should be working.  His parents are coming to help out.  The grandparents disapprove that Ellen is working.  Ellen thinks of setting up two widowers Sarah and Ben together.

 

There's a drought and it affects farming and their livelihood.  Clark and his dad Lloyd go and find some land to start digging for water.

Ellen coughs to foreshadow she's sick.  They have dinner with Ben and Sarah to get them to know each other.  Ellen later collapses.  The doctor is away so Sarah is a mid-wife and checks on Ellen.  She diagnoses her as having scarlet fever.  Clark tells daughter Missy that her mom is sick.  It could be contagious so has to stay away from mom.

 

There was a good scene where Missy takes a picture of her mom and sleeps with it.

 

Another good scene shows that Wes Brown is a really good actor.  He is crying with his wife.  He comes out with tears in his eyes that shows that Ellen has died.  This should be used for his acting reel.  There is no words as he looks at the grandparents and Missy.  You know she just died.

 

The grandparents decide to stay longer.  The Banker shows up again to ask for money.  Clark is about to punch Banker in the face when he asks for money, when his wife just died.  Reminder of money conflict.

 

The grandparents don't have money.  They think of taking care of Missy while Clark stays.

 

Clark is frustrated that he can't get water.

 

Throw in Missy cooking chicken, and a fire starts.  There's smoke and excitement.  They put out fire with a wet blanket and hits the fire with it.  The house is still standing and they sleep in the barn.

 

The subplot of Ben and Sarah are that they're dating.

 

The conflict of the house being burnt is solved pretty fast.  Ben says: "I'll give you some leftover wood from building my barn.  A whole crew of people volunteer to help.  The house is rebuilt.

 

Grandpa: Instead of looking at the burden of your home, think of it as a blessing.

He continues to give a pep talk to Clark about faith, God, and family to support you.

 

Clark pumps water and water comes.  He's all happy.

 

Throw in some conflict again when Missy eavesdrop on the adults talking.  Clark says it's easy to live with you and I hit water.  Missy runs away thinking she's going to be sent to live with grandparents, when if she stuck around Clark was going to have them stay with him.

 

The Banker shows up and the Grandparents say: "I put up my land as collateral so you can have an extension.

 

They can't find Missy and they start looking for her. Ben joins them.  It will be dark soon, so add some tension here.  Missy is lost and Clark finds the doll she was holding.  He finds her.

 

Ben then proposes to Sarah after what happened with Missy: "Life is short.  Will you marry me?"  She says yes.

It starts raining so you know the crops are going to grow.

 

I felt this TV movie was kind of forgettable.  There's just stuff happens, no antagonist- maybe the Banker.  The characters were likable, but bland.

writer in residence/ Borealis/ article

Jan. 21 Writer in Residence: The new Edmonton Public Library Writer in Residence Omar Mouallem read the first 20 pages of my Rain script.  He said what a lot of other writer in residences said about my script.  I need to work on the dialogue, it was predictable at times, etc. I then scanned the 43 pages of Rain again.  I need to take some time and break from it.  I can also use these notes and think about my The Vertex Fighter script. Jan. 23: I was taking a break from The Vertex Fighter since 2011.  It was a 2 yr break.  A couple of weeks ago, I did get an email from a producer saying that I can send the script in to them as long as I sign a submission release form.  I was biding my time as I waited for Omar to send me Rain feedback.  I was also watching the TV movie Borealis.  I read an article about it in the Edmonton Journal and it had a pic of a cage fight.  As soon as I saw that pic: "I have to read it, I have to watch it."  It's research for my Fighter script. Borealis: This was an average TV movie.  I expected it to be a MMA movie, but it only had a cage fight at the end.  The article did say it was more of a sci-fi movie set in 2045, but I still expected some fighting.  There were a few fist fights here and there.  It was more about the environment, and how in the future we're going to run out of resources and fight each other. I felt the story was kind of busy with a little too many characters, but at least they were all utilized.  There was lots of ethnic diversity like Aboriginal, Asian, Latino, and East Indian. There's a murder mystery, a little action. It's very Canadian with the cast and where it was filmed.  In the International Free Zone, Taq (Patrick Gallagher from Glee) is driving an ATV as the news anchor talks about the free zone.  Taq finds a dead body in this winter land that looks like the Northwest Territories.  It had good exposition with the voice over about how everybody is fighting for gas, oil, and minerals. Vic (Ty Olsson) is the lead character.  He is a manager at this bar.  Bettina (Cristina Rosato) is a prostitute and they're walking around the bar as they argue about who she brings into the bar.  Taq shows the dead body to Vic, no ID. Alison (Michelle Harrison) is a environmental scientist and she points gun at these Russian poachers who killed one of her polar bears.  Now the bad guys are set up in the story.  Alison shoots one of the Russians, and he hits her.  Vic steps in and hits them.  One of the first fist fights here.  Anton (Paulino Nunes) is the Russian leader. Vic: I'm a customs officer.  Hoshi (Mayko Nguyen from Rookie Blue) calls Vic through a TV telephone.  It seems she's the supervisor to him.  The biologist meets Dan (Greyson Holt) who is a professor searching for 18th century in-habitation. Roger (Terry Chen) is a doctor and examines the dead body.  He finds a 6 inch spike that the body was holding.  Raminder (Karan Oberoi) is a military chief and tells Vic: "You found a body on Canadian land, potential murder.  It's my business."  He investigates a little bit. Vic watches a video of himself in his last MMA fight where he gets kicked in the head.  Clive (Bryan Dick) finds out the body is a Norwegian archeologist.  Vic gets the prostitute Bettina to steal the spike that Lt. Raminder had taken from Vic because it was evidence in the dead body. Vic talks to the Russians about the dead body, and they tell him that the pilot committed suicide.  Yeah, right.  The biologist Allison puts a up a video blog about the dead body and the Russians are mad.  Vic tells Allison: "Now you started a war." The other biologist Dan tells Allison about the spike, and that it was stolen from a museum.  The plot thickens. Clive is beaten up to a pulp and he's floating in a room with no gravity.  Cool special effects.  Vic confronts the Russians about it. Allison finds another dead polar bear and a dead body. Bettina: Did you kill a man when you were an MMA fighter? Vic: No. Bettina: You have the money, citizenship to go anywhere, but why do you stay? He doesn't answer. Allison shows dead body to Vic, and the head is gone. Cut to later, a ATV is driving by the Russians.  The Russians think that person is stealing it, so they chase after it.  It's really a holograph without a head. Taq blows up the Russian's dig site.  Now that's some good action. Svetlana (Christine Horne) is the League of Nations liason pays a visit to them.  Vic meets with her. Bettina sees Russians try to break into the bar, and she yells at them to stop.  A soldier named Mason comes over and hits one of the Russians.  Finally, another fist fight. Lt. Raminder steps in.  The Russian leader Anton says: " Instead of filing a complaint to the military, let's settle this in a cage fight.  Mason will fight one of their guys. A Man is hurting himself, so Vic stops him.  It turns out he was on a drug called "Ghost Man." Anton has hired another Russian henchman Sergei (Darren Shahlavi) to work for him.  The Mongolian guy who was on the drug, wakes up and is mad from the drug.  He runs and Sergei gives one kick to him, and he's dead. Vic: The League of Nations is about to sell the only piece of oil left on my land. Hoshi researches Sergei for Vic. Hoshi: He was in the military.  He killed a Norwegian man, and now a Mongolian man. Vic (to Lt. Raminder): The liaison wants to make us look bad, so she can pretend to fix it. The stakes are raised.  The soldier Mason won't back down from the fight.  2 guys have signed a waiver form to fight.  We all know Mason is going to be killed if he fights. Allison tells the Liaison that the Arctic fox died from a bullet shell, and not from natural causes.   Russian (to Vic): If you give me back my spikes that you stole from my site, there is a chance that Mason will still be alive. So Vic breaks Mason's arm so he can't fight Sergei.  Vic did a good thing to save Mason's life. Mason is now safe, but now Vic isn't. Taq: He's younger, stronger, and more skilled.  What if you don't survive? The biologist Dan visits. Dan: I want to talk about the "package." Vic: We'll talk after the fight. Dan: But what if-? Vic: After the fight. The cage fight scene was brutal.  Vic gets hurt.  It was hard to watch him get hurt.  Sergei is scary looking and he was built.  Vic wins the fight when Sergei taps out. Vic walks away, but then Sergei runs from behind him.  Vic then kicks him down.  A Russian guy runs over to Sergei and feels his neck.  He looks at the leader Anton and shakes his head.  He's dead. Vic (to Anton): You are never going to get these spikes. Me: Yeah! Vic: First Russians get all the water, then the oil, then the food. This was a different kind of movie.  This wasn't really a MMA/ fight movie, but there was a different reason given to why there is a cage fight. Jan. 26 Article: Here's the excerpts from the article by Eric Volmers on Jan. 10, 2013. Ty Olsson (lead actor): It's 2 people, no weapons, hand-to-hand.  We were there every take.  The fight sequence itself as really energetic.  You had to commit to it.  You're not hitting, but you're putting the same effort into it.  Then we'd stop and change lenses or camera angles and I would skip rope, do pushups, do (tae kwondo).  So literally for 7 hrs I didn't stop.  It was the only time at a wrap party that I showed up, crawled into a corner and sipped my beer.  My body was shutting down.  I could barely walk. Andrew Wreggit (co-creator): It was the notion of competing for the last great oilfield.  It's based on the idea that just because we are running out, doesn't mean we don't want it anymore.  We'll use it up until it's actually gone before we figure something else out.  It's based on that idea.  There's more than just oil and gas up there.  There's more than just oil and gas up there.  Down the road, we're looking at the Arctic as potentially becoming a temperate climate.  When other parts of the world lose the ability to grow crops for example, all of that stuff will start moving North. Me: The show hasn't been picked up as a series, but there is some info about it. Wreggit: What format it takes, we're not sure at this moment.  We're definitely looking toward the future for this.  It was too much fun to give up on.  I've written some more episodes.  We didn't get too far down the road, but it definitely had a sense of where we would go in a full season.  There were definitely things I was laying in that I hope to follow up on.