email evolution/ constructive criticism/ Post Secret

This is on my www.badcb.blogspot.ca:

Oct. 4: This is a health email and a writing email.  There is an overlap of the subjects.  Writing is like a form of therapy for me.  I get to release my emotions and thoughts by writing.  Other people release their emotions and thoughts by singing, dancing, painting, working out, etc. 

Email evolution:

2005: After NAIT ended, I started emailing my friends nearly everyday.  I didn’t really get to see or hear from them, so I email them.

Towards the end of that year, one of my friends kind of introduced me to her brother.  I then continued to send these 3 little daily emails a day to my friends and him.  So it accumulates to like up to 21 emails a week.  I kind of knew my friend’s brother thought it was too many emails.  After about 3 months, my friend emailed me back saying he was overwhelmed by my amount of emails so stop sending so much.  She’s saying that on behalf of him because he doesn’t want to hurt my feelings.

2006: Prior to my friend telling me that, I was considering changing it to 2 emails a week.  So I started sending 2 big emails a week.  I guess I was trying to delude myself that my emails weren’t too much because no one said that it was too much.  It was dumb to delude myself.  So I’m sorry for sending too many emails. 

My opinion: My feelings weren’t hurt, because I kind of knew already, but there wasn’t that confirmation from him. 

2006 was the Year of Anger Management.  I had gotten laid off from my favorite job at Call Centre #1 and I was angry, depressed, bored, and lonely at home.  I did get a job at Call Centre #2 a month after the lay off, but I was still so angry that my job was taken away from me.

A couple of months after I changed to 2 emails a week, I bumped into my friend Jessica in downtown.  She says my emails were too long.  It was 30Kb in email drafts.  I then changed it to 20Kb. 

My opinion: Now that, I didn’t know that she found my emails were too long.  I wasn’t hurt by it.

2007: It was like that with 2 emails a week and 20Kb long.

Blog evolution:

2008: In my Professional Writing computer class, we were to create a blog as an assignment.  I created it.   A few months after the school year ended in Apr., I continued writing my weekly emails and putting it up on the blog.

2009: It was the same with 2 emails/ weekly blog posts that are 20kb long.

2010: The Year of Unemployment.  I then started sending 3 emails/ weekly blog posts.

It’s been the same on through 2011, 2012, 2013, and present.

Constructive criticism:

Grammar: I remember I was on a Facebook chat with my friend Michelle and she says sometimes my sentences don’t make sense.  She has to read them over again to see what I’m saying.  She didn’t give me an exact example, so I don’t know.

However, I did keep it in mind to make sure my sentences make sense.  It can be kind of hard because I’m too close to something.  This makes sense to me, but to other people it doesn’t.

My opinion: I wasn’t hurt by it.

Topics: I remember in 2011, my friend said this part in my email was boring where I listed all these actors I’ve seen and what they were in.  I was kind of hurt by it, but I learned from it.  To me, I thought listing all these actors was interesting.  But to her, it wasn’t. 

The next couple of weeks, I typed up all these news emails like what I saw on 20/20.  Two weeks later I called her to see if it was interesting.  She said yes, because it’s not about the topics, but I added my opinion on it.

From now on, I usually add my opinion on something either about the news or a TV show.

Also, the only time I write about actors and what they’ve been in is when I am reviewing a TV show or movie.  Sometimes I write about celebrity gossip.

My opinion: It kind of hurt, but it was helpful.  I didn’t know that she didn’t find it interesting, and by all means a lot of people didn’t either.

Friend’s opinions: I remember asking my friend Leslie why she hardly ever emails me back.  She said simply there’s nothing to say about the email.

My opinion: I wasn’t hurt by it.  I read a lot of things and I don’t have an opinion on everything I read.

I remember talking to my friend Jessica about my weekly emails in 2005, and she said she doesn’t read the emails where I write about TV shows like Dr. Phil and Oprah. 

My opinion: I was kind of hurt by it, because there was a good episode about Oprah where they discuss crystal meth.  I wanted to discuss that topic with Jessica, but she didn’t read it so we can’t discuss it.

Also I know now that whenever I write about Dr. Phil, she will skip to the next topic.

The above took me about 45 min. to write.  Now that I finished writing it, I feel like I released some emotions and thoughts.  I feel good now.

Oct. 5 Post Secret: The success of Post Secret is that people send their secrets on a post card.  It’s their emotions and thoughts.

May 4, 2014: “Thank you for telling me that I saved you. It helped me save myself, and now I am going to help others.”

My opinion: I’m going to put that in my inspirational quotes.

“I am a competitive woman.
I was a married woman.

I  had an Affair with a married man.

I was in competition with the wife of her husband and I had to win

Well I won the man, but I lost my soul,
My family,

My self- respect,

My everything.

Many people hate me

For what I did,

But not as much as I hate myself.

I’m a worthless Piece of s---=

But I won.”

My opinion: Get counseling.

May 18, 2014: “I can’t go on social media anymore because I get jealous of all your perfect lives.”

My opinion: Social media is an excerpt of people’s lives.  Do people tell a lot of bad things that happen to them?  I do read some, but for the most part it’s about people’s vacations and their kids.

“I’ve seen my chest x-rays and I know what it means. The good news, I know I won’t live long enough to worry about retirement.

My opinion: There are pros and cons. At least he knows.

“My two year affair with a younger man taught me to VALUE my husband.”

My opinion: This kind of reminds me of Maury where a man cheats on his wife.  He failed the lie detector test and there is video footage of him kissing another woman on the show.  When he was caught cheating, he laughed and was whatever with it as his wife yells at him. 

Next they come on the show about a year later and the wife says: “I cheated on you to get back at you for you cheating on me, and the baby may not be yours.”

She seemed really sad and guilty about it and the husband did too.  He knew if he didn’t cheat on her, they wouldn’t be in this situation.  The paternity proves that he is the father and I see the marriage working out.  I see that they both feel guilty about cheating on each other and they’re even.

Jun. 29, 2014:  

“He said he wanted a divorce.

I prayed not to be divorced.

He was diagnosed with cancer.

He died.

I’m not divorced.
I am a widow.

Be careful what you pray for.”

My opinion: Get grief counseling.  You praying for something may not have an effect on his death at all.